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Art
of Laughing
Here we come to the most important factor
that can vaporize the storm clouds in a matter
of seconds. Fun. Laughter. Yes. Have fun together.
Celebrate your togetherness and laugh away
your marriage blues. Laughter is regarded
as the most effective stress buster in any
relationship. If during a fight, one partner
suddenly begins to laugh, the whole atmosphere
becomes light, alive and vibrant. The ridiculousness
of the fight or argument is exposed and one
starts wondering ‘what a silly reason
to fight about’ (since most fights are
over very banal and silly nothings). India
being a land of festivals, it gives you all
the more reasons to celebrate your relationship
during various festivals with sweets, fire
crackers, lights and of course, hearts full
of love.
Art of Recognising,
Acknowledging and Accepting
But marriage is not all fun and play. Many
a times, conflicts arise due to intolerance
and refusing to accept the other the way he
or she is. Serious issues arise since individuals
cannot take pleasure in their differences
rather they keep crying about the lack of
similarity between the two. If the focus was
shifted from ‘what is not’ to
‘what is’, you will see how there
a thousand things about your spouse that you
will be thankful to God for. The logic ‘I
am nobody. Nobody is Perfect. Therefore I
am Perfect’ cannot be employed for any
human. So lets accept ‘what is’
and learn to count our blessings.
Art of Apologising
It has been seen that most marriages suffer
a setback due to ‘Ego’ problems.
Our Ego becomes our biggest enemy, when it
succeeds in pulling our settled lives apart
and turning the happiest of moments in to
gloomy and grim ones. Therefore the art of
apologizing needs to be mastered too with
the others mentioned above. During the engagement
period, many a fights take place, but then
comes the best part, and that is when one
of them readily asks for forgiveness. Chocolates,
bouquets, cards, perfumes, love letters are
all employed just to bring on the million
dollar smile of your mate. Suddenly the scene
changes after marriage. It hurts to apologise.
The ‘Why me when I haven’t done
anything wrong’ attitude starts playing
upon our psyche. Sometimes it does not matter
who apologises first. The ice needs to be
broken between the couple after a fight and
either of the two can take the initiative
to do it. Apologise, not for making a mistake,
but for hurting the feelings of your loved
one. The explanation and justification of
your acts can follow later.
Marriage is an institution that the world
depends on. One broken marriage can send ripples
throughout the society the way one pebble
does when thrown in still water. Therefore
one has to learn to weather the storms that
frequent their marriage, for storms can destroy
houses made of bricks and mortar not our hearts
that survive with the strength of love and
commitment for our loved ones. |
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